This morning as I read for my masters class, at Lancaster Bible College, I was struck by the reality that my tendency is to rely on myself. I mean other people have a tendency to let me down. Or should I say, my expectations of others, have a tendency to let me down? Relying on myself seems so much safer than trusting others. I would assume this makes sense to most of you reading this as you can likely relate.
But here is what really hit me. In moments of stress and anxiety I have a choice. Steve Cuss, in his book discussing leadership anxiety rocked me with this statement. “Most of the time we don’t exactly know what to do. We end up with a gap between not knowing what to do and needing to do something. The gap is one of the most uncomfortable places to live because a leader feels immense internal and external pressure to do something.” You feel that? Do you feel the pressure to DO something? To say something? It is in these moments that I am GUILTY for RELYING ON ME. When I feel a need to do something often I do it out of emotion. I do it out of SELF.
The Scriptures are very clear that in our weakness God is made strong. In our anxieties, fears, and doubts God wants to be present. But I RELY on ME! All to often I respond and make the situation worse.
What would happen if when faced with a decision I would:
- Pause…and wait for one minute?
- I would pray asking God for guidance?
- Seek more time before responding? Maybe take a walk or go sit in silence?
- Learn to rely on God instead of Myself?
